Heaven in a Pint

I think I am in love! Ice Cream, which seems to agree with me and which tastes very much like ice cream should. Goat's Milk. A local ice cream shop had some goat's milk ice cream which I tried and liked very much. Theirs was a bit tangier.

LaLoo's is perfect and creamy and sweet and just perfect with berries. I will admit that I miss cold and creamy things. I can stand my new eating regimen most of the time, but of late I have been craving smooth and creamy and sweet and something - anything to eat with my berries.

I tried making a panacotta type thing with Rice Milk. Um yeah - not so much. I think sometimes I just crave certain things and the alternative sometimes falls short.

I have tried their chocolate and well it was ok. This round I tried the vanilla snowflake and well - I am in love. It is absolutely perfect. I will admit to eating the pint in less than the 4 servings - but seriously - it has been years since I have had ice cream (aside from my taste test of the locally produced goat's milk ice cream.) I have been craving something and wow - I discovered this gem in the freezer case at Whole Foods.

If I were to have one wish - it would be that they tone down the sugar just a tad. As afore mentioned - when eats nothing sweetened with corn syrup - well most things taste uber sweet. This is just on the ok side of being too sweet.

I wonder...

Today E and I went to the park that is very near our house. Our neighborhood is very close to a river and next to the park is a small wooded area and I guess you could call it a valley, but there is a steep incline going down to the river. This wooded area is the nesting area for vultures and some hawks. We have a hawk who lives in our back yard at certain times of the year. She is beautiful to watch and very regal.

So today as E played on the slides, I was sitting in the swing and watching the vultures and hawks fly around. The sky was a crystal blue, so clear and there were no clouds. The birds looked as if they were floating in the sky, their black wings shiny in the sunlight. Now I can tell which are vultures and which are hawks based on size. The vultures are larger birds and rather bald.

I think when we think of hawks, we think of them being strong and powerful birds of prey. They are regal, in fact I think kings have kept hawks for display and sport for centuries. Many sports teams have a hawk as a mascot. As does my alma mater.

Now vultures on the other hand, they get a bad wrap. They feed on dead animals and sometimes prey on dying animals. In common speech we say things like - the vultures are circling or so and so is a vulture.

But to watch them fly today - the vultures were just as graceful, just as powerful and just as beautiful as the hawks. They flew in perfect circles on the wind currents. It was lovely to watch. So peaceful and yet so powerful.

I imagine we associate vultures with death and that is what makes them seem less majestic and powerful, but is it really more majestic to stalk and slaughter a little mouse or other small mammal as a hawk does or is it better to eat that which is going to go to waste anyway and spread bacteria in the process? Vultures serve the communities in which they live by eating what is left to waste. I read online that in India and Pakistan, when animals die the farmers and herders leave them in the fields for the vultures and because of over use of a particular drug in the live stock, which is deadly to vultures, much of the vulture population has died and the rate of illness among the farmers, due to decaying dead flesh is on the rise. Diseases such as botulism are kept in check by vultures and without them it is spreading through the towns and villages.

Both birds serve a purpose, the hawks keep us from being over run by rabbits and field mice and the vultures keep our wooded areas and fields free from dead animals, which spread disease. In flight they are both majestic and graceful, full of power and beauty.

So I wonder, why do we value one above the other...

Glitter is Great

Well it is actually. I have some new glitter and I am so pleased. I have done something I have always wanted to do and I am making a statement. I am showing my inner creativity and inner wild child these days - on my nose! I have a little blue sparkle on my nose! I love it. It is me - it is a sign of my creativity and I have wanted to do this for years - but the former JOB - well they frowned upon such self expression.

H and I went to Pierceolgy last weekend. It did not hurt at all - not even a little bit. It is healing like a dream - I am soaking my nose in salt water - yeah that is a challenge but fun! The stone brings out my eyes. L loves my glitter. She points it out to people. E is not so sure he down with it. My mom just rolled her eyes and my bro said I had lost my mind. It matters not to me. I love it!

Now lest you all think I am crazy - I should say that I have more glitter and it is not just in my ears!

This spring, whilst in New York - I went with my friend SS and got my navel pierced. It was to celebrate being at pre-pregnancy weight minus 5 pounds. For those keeping track - I am 10 pounds lighter now verse then. (I love running!) I wanted something to remind me of the hard work I had done getting to that milestone and something to keep me focused on staying on track.

Now I should say - I am terrified of needles! Big time - to the tune of opted to have babies the old fashion way terrified - cuz that epidural needle is seriously huge.

The piercer in New York (we went to LeRoi in the East Village) actually I think nearly busted a gut trying to laugh when SS told me - well this should be nothing compared to birthing babies... It was not. It is did not hurt a bit and I never really saw the needle. I had my eyes closed. Same for with my nose. Actually - they ask you to close your eyes.

I have said I am done for now! I mean I am not trying to collect sparkles. Each of these piercings means a great deal to me. One was to celebrate where I had been - to mark a place in my journey and the other is more of a reminder of where I am going. I wanted an outward sign of what I am feeling inside - I wanted something to make people stop and think before they judge me - or a sign that I have an edge - an edge I am very proud of - an edge I am embracing more and more everyday. Something that makes me unique. I am not nor will I ever be a soccer mom. I am a creative force - I am on a path I have chosen for myself, I live everyday as if it were my last. I am happy and proud of my accomplishments and I have places yet to go!

It is about reaching for the stars and living the life you were meant to live.

My relationship with Pizza

Cindy C is the winner of my little contest. She wanted to know about my relationship with Pizza.

Well we have broken up - sad to say. I choose not to eat pizza. My friend SS says I should wear a t-shirt that says - "Pizza could kill me." With the wheat and cheese - it might not kill me but it could make feel pretty darn sick.

Before I embraced all my food issues - I ate pizza. H and I would enjoy pizza night. We generally ordered from Donatos.

We would get the veggie, Founder's favorite or the Mexican pizza alot. Always thin crust. I do not remember feeling especially sick after eating pizza - but I do remember sometimes feeling ugh! and thinking it was the grease.

In college with my roommate P - we ordered Papa Johns alot. Always with mushrooms and cheese. They cut their pizza in slices - pie shaped. He liked it that way.

I have eaten a slice in NYC and it is heaven. It always tastes unique and they have creative toppings. I was never all that into Chicago style pizza or deep dish pizzas.

There was also a time that H made alot of pizza from scratch at home. He would make the crust and roll it out. It was always very good. My MIL made what she called a parsley pizza. She would make the dough herself and then made a mixture of sour cream and fresh chopped parsley. It was very good also. I made it once or twice.

For awhile I missed pizza - it is quick and easy and the kids love it. But now I look at pizza and feel sick to my stomach. It is too much of stuff guarantee to give me trouble.

The odd thing is I have never been all that into pasta. We have never eaten alot that of pasta. I never made pasta much. I also never ordered pasta out. Pasta always left me with an upset stomach - go figure it is all wheat - but then why not pizza?

That is a question that will just have to remain unanswered - pizza and I have called it quits - I will not eat it and it will not call to me - or hint at how yummy it is. H rarely orders it while I am around - feeling badly that I cannot eat it any longer - but really it is ok. I will enjoy my soy cream cheese with some veggie or lox on a rice cake and he can have is pizza - because at the end of day I feel great!

ah flowers in the spring....

well more like flowers in December - but they are so lovely I had to share them. Friends gave them to us - they are beautiful and smell wonderful and well I had to brighten the blog with the also!

Happy 4th of July

Well today is Independence Day - the birth of our nation. It is really something spectacular. I thought I would talk about something really important to me. Freedom of Speech. I happen to like all kinds of freedom, but I especially like this one. I have always valued that I live in a country where I am free to express my ideas, thoughts and feeling - without fear that my government can throw me in jail because they do not agree with what I have said or written. In many many places around the world that is not the case. Now, our system is not perfect. We are not without flaws, but for the most part we are free to express ourselves, in a variety of media, without fear. In places like, China, Iran, Cuba, and North Korea - freedom of speech is just not an option.

So as a for instance, I was thinking today, that in the afore mentioned places, I could not get away with this but in the USA I can. So I am going to......

I think you can tell alot about a guy based on his underwear preference. Boxers, for one, offer a wide range of expression - be it plaid (a Scotsman perhaps), cute little bears and log cabins (a nature lover perhaps) and so on you get the point. I think it takes a certain kind of man to pull off a Spedo. (Oh no my eyes my eyes - ahhhhhh.) So I was thinking this morning, just what kind of underwear does our gutless (oops did I actually type that - I meant fearless - bad fingers very bad fingers.....) leader wear? MMMM. Well GW is seriously lacking in imagination, so I am thinking themed boxers would be out of the question. Well, then I am fairly certain that a Spedo is not really his thing either. (Thank God!) While he does jog, I am going to have to say that the sporty boxer brief is not a likely choice either. (Forget about a low rise boxer brief. Yikes not going there.) So after much more thought on the matter than truly necessary I am going to have to say that our largely unimaginative and totally inept leader, more than likely goes with your run of the mill, tighty whitey - plain old briefs.

So you see, in this country I am totally entitled to my opinion. The thought police cannot come to my house, with their shorts in a knot. I am allowed to express my opinions. There are groups in the US who have dedicated their life's work to making sure that we are allowed to express ourselves. (the ACLU as an example) Dissension is patriotic. We must never rest on our laurels. Discussion and debate is a good thing. It keeps the Constitution alive. It honors those, who have given their lives in the pursuit of securing those ideals for all Americans and people around the global.

Freedom of Speech ensures that we are free to exchange ideas, even ideas unpopular with many. It means that we can read what want, write what we want, say what we feels needs to be said. It means that we can watch what we choose in the privacy of our own homes.

But it does have its limits. We cannot outright lie about people. (So if I knew for a fact that GW does in fact wear a Spedo - I really need to own up to that fact.... WHICH I SO HAVE NO WAY OF KNOWING.....) It also means that I should offer a fair and balanced explanation for my thoughts. (Yeah ok it is my blog, so I get to say what I want. In a news article, I should be fair and balanced.) I think it is helpful in the pursuit of an honest debate - to avoid personal attacks and the like. But on a whole freedom of speech ensures that we can question and we comment without fear that we could lose of lives, homes, jobs. It ensures that we are free to think and explore.

So I raise my glass to every Dissident who is currently away from their families because they made the choice to speak up and out. I raise my glass to every active duty service man and woman - who is away from friends and family - serving our nation. I raise my glass to every veteran - who has served with honor and pride. I raise my glass to every American who feels passionate about something and who uses their voice to speak out, act up and stand proud.

It really is a reason to celebrate.

Blue Skies

Today was a near perfect day. Today is the kind of day that makes me love living in Ohio. The sky is a color of blue, that I have never seen anywhere else. It has a depth, a richness to it. The green grass and trees really contrast so nicely. The sun was bright and warm.

L, E, and I went to the library via the bike trail. It was just such a nice day to be outside.

I have to say that we are blessed with a precious few days like this. Normally it is too humid or there is a bit of a chill in the air or something. But sometimes, it is amazing to me, the day can be picture perfect, as if it were painted on a canvas or taken out of a story book.

It is something to be savored.

Out of the mouth of babe's

This is what L said to me yesterday:

"Mom, I really do not like riding in the car."

Me: "Well why not?"

L: "Because I cannot see your beautiful face."

Wow. What a gift to treasure......

Pricessess, Witches and Divas, OH MY!

H and I have attempted to stem the flow of Disney princesses into L's life. So far we have been reasonable successful. Seriously, at two years of age, did she need a collect of cheap princess junk. No, I think not.

But now as she approaches 5, she is into princesses. She likes to talk about Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Belle and the like. We have been reading non-Disney books about them all. We have also been watching a bit of Sleeping Beauty, Beauty and the Beast, and the Little Mermaid.

I am not sure how I feel about this all. I want her to be culturally literate and on pare with her peers, but I also want to make sure that she grows up to be a strong, confident woman.

So from time to time, I ask leading questions or just probe a bit to see what she has on her princess mind.

So I asked her the other day, "When you play princesses at school, who gets to be the prince."

She looks at me as if I have three sets of eyes and says, "Mom, we don't need a prince, really, Mom! We are modern princesses."

Oh!

Then the other day in the car she begins to really drill down to the plot in Little Mermaid.

"Mom. If Ursula is disguised as Vanessa and using Ariel's voice, which she took from her, it should sound the same. But it does not. Ariel's voice was prettier. Why is that."

So I decided to test again. "Why do you think that it is not a pretty."

She pauses and says, "Well Ursula is mean. So I think Ariel's voice can only be pretty when Ariel has it, since she is nice."

I mention that beauty comes from the inside. Which L thought about for a long time.

I am still not sure about the princess deal, but then my princess rode her bike today singing that she was a princess, who was strong and powerful. The entire bike ride.

Yeah, so about being a DIVA?

Postage

Forty-one cents! Who are they kidding? Am I getting my mail faster? Will this stop the junk mail? Will I have to wait in line less time?

Normally one expects more when they pay more.

Waiting & People - Random wise wisdom

I have to say that one of the best things about traveling is people. I think watching people is one of the best ways to pass the time at the airport.

So since I had to wait about 2.5 hours on my friend to arrive in NYC today, I found a comfortable spot near her gate, drug out the iPod and my book. What could be better, music, a good book and 2 hours of time to read.

Well, a bit into my reading, an older couple arrived at the gate in wheel chairs. The looked to be in their 80s. I continued reading as they settled in next to me and began to talk to each other.

It was so sweet. They were so into each other. I just kept reading.

Then the gentleman, taps me on the shoulder and I take out my headphones and direct them towards the the restrooms.

Continue reading.

Then Ruth, the older lady, comes back. Her companion had shared with me that they had been in NYC for a week and were heading back to FLA. They had also been to a wedding in Boston. To which, I am thinking - you go you guys.... rock on! Traveling so much and being older. He had also shared with me that Ruth was 98 years old.

Get out, she did not look 98. Old yes, 98, no way.

So as she settles in we begin to talk. She is very nice and I got a bit of info on the grand kids and great grand kids. (She also tells, me rather conspiraciously that the gentleman is not her husband, but rather a really good friend and a great guy to travel with! To which I am thinking you go girl.....)

But then she hits me with a zinger. After she confides, that she happens to have a few years on me. She suggests that I start to savor and relish every experience I can, because when I am her age, that is what really matters. Those memories are what you savor. Your mental photo album, has real value she says.

Wow! I was thinking about that the other day, but she laid it out with such a seriousness, like she had really given this alot of thought. Like it was a juicy bit, the secret to life, that she had chosen to share with me.

Then as the time crept up and it was time to go meet my friend, I wished them safe travels and she shook my hand and kissed my cheek, telling me that I should live life well.

Wow! I mean it was random, but profound too. I really hope they made it back to the sunshine state alright. They were inspiring.

Here's to living life to the fullest!

Death by Chocolate....well sort of

You know some days are just better than others. Yesterday in general was a good day, until after diner when I tried to bake my brothers birthday cake. I got L & E settled down, and then set out to bake a flourless chocolate cake. I am on a wheat-free, corn-free, and dairy-free regime and my bro is working hard to lose some extra pounds. So I thought this might be a good choice for us all. (I figured the leftovers could go home to the bros housemates!)

So I grabbed my trusty mix-master, chopped 12 oz of yummy chocolate, melted some butter and beat the snot out of 6 eggs with sugar. (Let's face it, it is always better to beat stuff up with sugar, right?) I lined my springform pan with parchment paper - so my cake would have a smooth top and since this was a special birthday - I went ala Martha and made a stencil out of parchment - "30" that's right - he is 30! I was going to put powered sugar on top using the stencil.

I was living large......

So I beat the eggs and sugar, folded in the melted chocolate and butter and filled up my spring form. Popped it in the over and settle down with some tea, to watch some television as it baked.

So 15 minutes into my rest break, I hear this "Pop, whoosh!".... think it is outside and keep on resting. Then I start to smell this awful burning chocolate smell. (Ok, strange the cake is supposed to bake for an hour!) Go into the kitchen to check it out - Yep, you guessed it, cake everywhere all over the oven. One big, huge, gooey cake eruption & explosion. Yikes. So I switched off the oven and let the thin layer of cake left in the pan cool and cleaned up the best I could.

Needless to say the cake was well -- Toast!

So I served Girl Scout Thin Mints and Raspberries - because really - chocolate in any form is really ok! (I refrained from the cookies and went right for the dark chocolate I had tucked away!) Everyone seemed happy and chocolate satisfied!

Happy Birthday, little brother :)

Ice machine Part 3

Ok recently I wrote about my funny ice machine story. Well it is broken again. It has been for a month or so. H called Sears and Sears called today to let me know that they could come by today. Same guy. This is the 4th trip here (it broke this time last year too!) We agreed we needed to stop meeting like this.

Anyway - he fixed again.

The funny thing this time - I have lost my voice. I can hardly talk above a whisper......

Memories and old stuff

I have a few saved posts that I am not done with, but wanted to put this out there. H and I are big E*Bayers - mainly we have selling all our old stuff. (actually stuff our parents have given us and used airplane parts.) We have been busy selling more stuff - as we clean out his mom's house and our basement. As reformed pack rats there is alot of stuff.

So - in a jar of old jewerey and the like, I found my grandfather's service pins from when he worked for State Penn and then for the State of Ohio. He retired from the State of Ohio in the late 70s. (He had had a heart attack and was of retirement age. I was about 6 or 7 years old.)

Well, I decided to sell the pins on Ebay. I thought a collector might really like to have them. Clearly they meant very little to me - since they were mixed in a jar with old hair clips, some old buttons and so forth.

Well they sold for $60. (there were 5 of them.) I was really pleased, because hey - I got $60 for something that was in my basement and presumably someone that will spend $60 for old pins must really want them and will take care of them. To them they will be meaningful.

So I packaged them up and mailed them off to the buyer and did not think a think of it. Until the buyer emailed me to to thank me for the quick shipment and said the following:

"Received pins today in fine condition. What prison did your dad work at? Do you have any of his badges from the prison? Can't figure out why someone would want to sell items of the family like this but they will all go in my personal collection of Ohio prison items."

Well, the last line of that email bothered me like a bad toothache for the better part of yesterday. I am not really sure why. To me, my grandfather was not a prison guard or the manager of the machine shop for the Ohio Penn. He was the man who puttered in the garage and mowed the grass on his Cub Cadet riding mower. He was the man, who taught me to drive 3 on the column in an old Chevy Impala when I was 14 years old - because it was fun and he was bored that summer. We stayed with him on Thursdays while my grandmother went to her Sewing Circle.

He called the buffet at Elby's "The Trough" and used to meet his friends for lunch there. He would walk around town in ratty old pants and shirt with over $1000 in $20s in his pocket. He loved going to the Hardware store to get the daily update.

He was a good man. He worked hard. During the depression he hauled coal from West Virginia and then would whatever he could back down. He married my grandmother and they were married for 53 years. They survived some really difficult times. He survived the Ohio Penn riots - because he had been fair and kind to the inmates and they had hidden him in a closet. Otherwise he would have died.

He is the reason I got to study abroad in high school. He gave my mom the money to cover the trip. He felt I should go see the world.

He also slipped me money - the last night I saw him alive. The night before I left for Germany. He was in the hospital. He was dying of cancer. We all knew it and we did not talk about it. I had offered to stay home and he told me "Suzy - you are getting on that plane and you are going to experience all that you can, learn all that you can, and love life." He gave me some more spending money and told me to take alot of pictures and bring back something to remind me of my trip. It was one of the only times I saw him cry. He knew he would never see me again. I was so sure he would still be there when I got back.

I bought a Steif Teddy Bear with that money. I still have it. I would never get rid of that bear - but some old pins? For me it is just not the same.

He died while I was gone. He was buried and I missed it all. For a long time that haunted me, but I now know that I was fulfilling my destiny and that is what he wanted. I was getting to see a part of the world he had only read about. I was getting the education that he had never had the opportunity to get. I was experiencing life. What a gift.

This entire train of thought - also reminded me of a conversation that I had with a school mate. who also went on the trip. He had taken no pictures and had purchased very few momentous. I had asked him: "Why not??" and he told me something to the effect that his memories were in his heart and mind and would be with him always.

I did not believe him then - but I do now. The best memories are in your mind and heart. Stuff is just stuff. The experiences stick with you forever. It is not about how many pictures you have, but the memories you nurture and the time you take to care about others.

So, does the email still bother - NO. I have what is truly important.