Marriage is a social contract

I am going to come out and talk about another unpopular subject. Marriage. I think this country is facing some HUGE HUGE HUGE issues and marriage is one of them.

Some people in this country are rather vocal about Marriage being between one man and one woman and all about LOVE. Really? Let's examine this.

Marriage gets me a break on my taxes and my health benefits. It gets me certain rights, specifically if my partner dies. I get tax advantages when inheriting my partner's personal property. Marriage means I can own property with my partner in a special married persons sort of way. The tax advantages tied to marriage are huge. The distribution of wealth in the marriage contract are rather advantageous.

Marriage means my children have certain advantages - specifically where property and their financial care is concerned. It also affords them certain protections and customs for their care - should the partnership dissolve.

Marriage means that my life partner can make certain choices for me or will be afforded certain courtesies should I be ill and in the hospital.

Marriage used to mean - that I was property. That I was no longer my fathers financial burden but rather my husbands.

In many cases I would be the "prize" to seal a land swap or some other deal worked out by the men in power.

Is anyone detecting a pattern here?

Marriage is and historically was about money and legal rights. We as a cultural have dressed it up to be about love. Sure maybe it is. In our culture it is a blend of all of the above. In many cultures around the world it is about property, marriages are arranged and are not "love matches" there is an air of practicality.

I fully support "gay marriage." I think that a culture is strengthen by stable unions. If we are going to afford all these "rights" to married people - then everyone should have the right to pair off as they see fit.

If marriage is going to be about a man and a woman being in love - then nix the special tax benefits and make it about love and all that who-haw.

It should not be about both. It should not be exclusive. A union that combines should not simultaneously exclude others from certain rights.

Taxes are a function of government and Marriage can either be a function of government (social contract) or a function of love or a function of the religious right.

It matters not to me - as long as the playing field is equal and fair.

Are my gay friends no more or less in love and no more or less committed that H and I? Who am I to judge? Who is the religious right? Or defenders of marriage?

If anyone for a minute thinks that the weddings and marriages in the Biblical times had solely to do with LOVE, they need to think again. It was legalized slavery. Women were bought and sold - dressed up as marriage. It was about money and property and getting one more mouth out of the tent and into someone else's tent. Could Love happen? Sure. But it was not about love - it was about money and the clan and honor and it was all about MEN! As an aside - in many biblical cultures - men had more than one wife! Kinda makes the one man and one woman thing seem like a newer concept now doesn't it.

I would also humbly submit that families are best built by free choice and that LOVE comes in all forms and is splendid.

Taxes advantages and wealth distribution should not be tied to a social contract available to a select group. Where is the democracy in that?

The season...

of not eating is here! I am busy writing for one of my clients and I am doing some short blog entries and it hit me - From Halloween through New Year's I spend a disproportionate amount of time explaining why I am not eating X, Y or Z.

Nope no snickers pie for me. Nope sorry no caramel apples, caramel apple pie, pumpkin pie, cranberry corn bread stuffing, corn bread, Christmas cookies, cocktail weenies, fudge, sticky pudding, or eggnog. No Christmas Stoelen, sticky buns or otherwise.

I do plan to explore some me friendly versions of the above once MY KITCHEN is finally done, but the bottom line for me, holiday parties are lean for me and well that is ok. I tend to stay the same size during the holidays and I no longer have to resolve to hit the gym 5 days a week come January.

I am however considering making myself a sign "I eat bird seed! Happy Holidays!" or "Do you know what is in that? Yeah! Me either, so I am not eating it..."

Just shut up and nod...

Ok I have developed a skill. I call it "Shut Up and Nod..." I have learned that some things are worth addressing and sometimes it is just better to shut up and nod!

For example, the contractor sent someone over to clean today. Just here and there becasue the trim guys got saw dust all over the place becasue they had not hung up the plastic over the bathroom door.

OMG there is so much dust in my house how in the hell did they notice yesterday's saw dust.

I just held my tongue and nodded. Frankly yesterday I was too tired to think straight, let alone argue...

Today they installed a temp sink and counter.... Why? I get that the counter is going to take a week or so before it is ready to be installed and that we are slowly inching to the finish line - but DO THEY SERIOUSLY think I am going to sort of move into my partially done kitchen. Are they insane? I am not moving anything into that kitchen until they are DONE and vacate and I can clean properly...

So I just nodded and agreed that it was SO nice to have my temp sink and counter top...

Really it is just easier...

Bicycle made for 4 +

In my less than veiled attempts to get everyone pumped up about pedal power - I bring you the bicycle surrey!



It has a basket in the front for little people E road up there and L between H and I. E was excited becasue we had found a bike with no handle bars and L was a front seat steerer...

All good and a great way to get around the island.

Just think of the possibilities in the city. Perfect for trips out to dinner, to the grocery and back and forth to school.

Ponder... gas is cheaper but think of all the pounds burned and the gas conserved! Plus it SO is like a car! *note the headlights!*

See what happens...

when you go on vacation and leave the contractors alone in your house!